How To Save A Life
by Paris-Syndrome
Summary: Liv is tired of her affair with Elliot.Please be gentle.


A/N: No Turning Back is almost done...lol. I've never written a song fic so I don't know how this is going to turn out! Please be nice to me! R&R. _Olivia thinking looks like this. __**And the lyrics look like this... **_Olivia's mom's words..or whatever _look like this also...but you'll know which one is her mom talking..._so...ya. 

Disclaimer: I own...NOTHING! Wooo! lol. Yes..I'm stupid. I'm loaded up on sugar from these damn ice cream shakes cuz its 107 degrees here in good o' Arkansas! Someone kill me...I prefer for Elliot to kill me...or other things..lol

Lyrics belong to The Fray

_What are you doing Olivia? What are you doing? Turn around. Right now! It's easier to continue this thing then to break His heart. Again. You could just leave. Just drive right past his apartment and drive God knows where. Just disappear._

Step fourteen. Step fifteen. Step sixteen. The elevator would have gotten you there way to fast so instead you take the stairs and count them on the way up. You're usually happy to be making this journey. Not tonight though. You called him thirty minutes ago and told him to meet you here.

You softly knock on the door. Once. Twice. Three times. Maybe he won't hear you. No such luck because there he is. His big frame replacing the door. He's moving towards you and you know what he thinks you came here for. You turn your head and his kiss lands on your cheek by your ear.

"Elliot, we need to talk." He looks at me with suspicion and turns towards the kitchen. "Sit down. It's just a talk." He nods and sits down on the couch arm looking at me. "Elliot I've been in a lot of bad relationships, you know that, and." _You have no idea what to say. He's looking at you smiling, patiently awaiting you to continue. _"I can't do this anymore." You blurt out. His smile disappears.

"Olivia, kiss me one last time and tell me if you really want to end it." He walks over to you and presses his lips to yours and its like fire. _Shit. You could do this. You could just keep living your life like this and no one would get hurt.  
But you._ You pull away quickly.

"El-Elliot. I can't. Not anymore. I'm sorry. I blame myself for this. I was fine when we started but now. Now I'm scared to death." _Why did you come here Olivia? You watch his posture change. He's pissed and confused. But mostly pissed._

__

_**Step one you say we need to talk  
He walks you say sit down it's just a talk  
He smiles politely back at you  
You stare politely right on through  
Some sort of window to your right  
As he goes left and you stay right  
Between the lines of fear and blame  
And you begin to wonder why you came**_

_****_

_Where did this go wrong? We were so happy at first. Finally, eight years of built up sexual tension was being worked out. In more ways than one. More position's than one also. But not anymore. Because it has to end. And you have no idea what to do now._

_  
__**Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend  
Somewhere along in the bitterness  
And I would have stayed up with you all night  
Had I known how to save a life**_

"Olivia how can you say that?"

"Elliot its for the best. For everyone involved. Believe me. I know I'm right and so do you." _You are right, right? Yes. Right._

"What do you mean _for everyone involved?"_

"Do you want a list of people and certain things in our lives that make this complicated? And could be at risk? One. Kathy. Two. The baby. Three. Our Jobs. Four. The Brass. Five. Kathy. Six. Me."

"You said Kathy twice."

"I know that damn it. It's because she's one of the main people who can get hurt. Again." 

"Why'd you say you?"

"Because you've already hurt me," _You look around for an escape route. Yep, nothing. _"You told me that you were going back to Kathy. A month ago. A fucking month ago Elliot. You kept this apartment for our little rendezvous. As if I didn't feel like a slut enough. And I can't take it anymore." _Please listen to me Elliot. _

_  
__**Let him know that you know best  
Cause after all you do know best  
Try to slip past his defense  
Without granting innocence  
Lay down a list of what is wrong  
The things you've told him all along  
And pray to God he hears you  
And pray to God he hears you**_

_**  
**_  
_Where did this go wrong? We were so happy at first. But not anymore. Because it has to end. And you have no idea what to do now._

_  
__**Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend  
Somewhere along in the bitterness  
And I would have stayed up with you all night  
Had I known how to save a life**_

_****_

"Damn it Olivia. What the hell?" He says, his voice rising. "I am going to leave Kathy. After the baby."

"No your not." _I'm so calm it scares me._

"Also, what about our jobs? I'll leave Manhattan SVU."

"No you wont." _You need to leave. _"Elliot, the job is all I have. I don't know what I would do if I lost it. The same goes for you except you also have a family. And you know you won't leave either one of them. I'm giving you a chance here El. Leave me. Go back to your wife and raise that child. We don't ever have to talk about this again." He's starring at me. Elliot's eyes are ice blue and I'm frozen. _He's either going to admit to it or he's going to say he's changed._

"Olivia, I've changed in the last year that Kathy and I haven't been together. You're right, I won't give up on my job or my marriage this time." _Or both. _I can fell my tears running down my face. "And it was wrong for me to do this to you." I watch as he kisses the top of my head and walks out the door. He's gone. _Why did you come Olivia?_

_  
_  
_**As he begins to raise his voice  
You lower yours and grant him one last choice  
Drive until you lose the road  
Or break with the ones you've followed  
He will do one of two things  
He will admit to everything  
Or he'll say he's just not the same  
And you'll begin to wonder why you came**_

I fall against the door that Elliot just walked out of. "Damn it." I'm screaming and kicking the door.

_"This was never going to work out Olivia, you should have known that. Learned from my mistakes. _My mother's voice is ringing in my head. I need to silence her.

_I don't know why I came._ I keep repeating that to myself like a mantra. _I don't know why I came._ All the way down riding the elevator. _I don't know why I came._ I step off and out the doors. _You never should have came._ I give the cab driver the name of the bar closest to my apartment. _I never should have came. _

_You never should have came Olivia. Learned from my mistakes._

_  
__**Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend  
somewhere along in the bitterness  
And I would have stayed up with you all night  
Had I known how to save a life**_

A/N: I don't know why the first set of lyrics aren't centered... THANKYOU to my wonderful Beta!


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